This post is about Day #2 on our two year wedding anniversary and the best marriage advice we’ve learned.
READ ABOUT DAY #1 HERE: BEST ADVICE EVER IN TWO WORDS.
The next morning we left our hotel and finally made it to, Lutsen Ski Area.
As the morning sun rose above the pine-forest covered hills, the first chair lifts began to turn. We were two of the first skiers to get onto the Gondola. With 1000 skiable acres, Lutsen, in my opinion, is the best area in the Midwest. The runs are long, steep, and just challenging enough to give you a thrill as you reach top speed and fly down them. Lutsen Ski Area isn’t as sprawling and awe-inspiring as real mountain resort, but since it’s only a few hours away, and a fraction of the price ($300 for both of us for 2 nights/2 days), it was well worth the money to explore the northern backyard of our home state.
As we got to the top of the gondola, we walked out onto the peak of the first run and clicked our boots into our skis. I looked down at the ski trail and pulled down my goggles. I said to my wife: “It’s taken us two years of marriage to learn how to succeed together. Are you ready to leave the past two years of learning lessons behind us, and explore new adventures in the next few years?”
My wife pulled her goggles down and I saw excitement flash in her eyes. It was almost like she was looking into the future. Her fears of failure disappeared. “If we do our best, and keep learning every chance we get, there’s nothing that we can’t accomplish. Let’s do this.”
We pushed off and I followed her down the slopes. The ski run transitioned into more runs, and we weaved in and out of trees as we carved deep turns into the freshly groomed snow.
We’ve been married two years now. The first two years were full of rocky moments, but we fought through them like champions together. I realized as we skied, that the period of adjusting to our new life living together was coming to an end. We were now entering the stage where we can start fluidly complementing each other’s strengths and working together like a well-coached team to accomplish our goals.
When we reached the bottom of the run, we jumped on the next express lift that carried us back to the top.
On the chair lift ride, I thought about the conversation we had yesterday about the best advice ever in two words. What we called, “Teach me.”
“Teach me,” is such a simple concept; yet so powerful. So many people are so unaware of how life-changing those two words can be when they’re applied properly with a teachable attitude.
We got to the top and immediately started skiing down the next run. We saw a sign quickly approaching that warned a double-black-diamond, expert run was coming up. I yelled to my wife, “Are you ready for this challenge?” I asked.
She yelled back with a huge smile on her face, “I am. We can do this!”
It was an awesome feeling as we made the turn and skied into expert terrain. We skied the rest of the day together and I realized why our marriage works.
It’s because we both have the same dreams in life.
As my wife and I reached our two year anniversary, I realized that’s the best marriage advice for newlyweds I could give.
Find ways to want the same life as your partner. Find ways to dream the same dreams. Then spend the rest of your life working together as a team to try to turn those dreams into reality.
My wife and I may fight and argue over the little things. But we never fight about the life we both want.
We just want to serve God, and make the world a better place as we go.
That’s a deep enough purpose that should be strong enough to hold any marriage together for life.
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Great two posts. Keep it up! And it sounds like you had a phenomenal vacation!
Thanks Dan! We did have a great time. And for anyone who is reading this and wants to learn more about savvy personal finance decisions, make sure to check out Dan @ Pennies and Dollars post on: “How Smart People Save For Vacation!” He even featured us on there! http://penniesanddollars.com/crazy-not-crazy-ways-smart-people-save-vacations/
My advice would be to accept your partner for who they are. Of course there are exceptions, like if they’re a raging alcoholic or something, but overall you’d be surprised how many issues you avoid if you think “This is who they are, this is how they think/act, and I love them for being that person.” If you can’t do that, then perhaps they aren’t the person for you anyway.
Hi Luke! Thanks for the awesome comment and advice on marriage. I think you’re right on about that. Since we’ve only been married for two years, we’re still learning how far you can push your partner, before you just have to accept the fact that they’re their own unique individual and will never think exactly like you do. At least in our marriage, my wife and I try to push each other to be the best we can be. That’s the standard we try to hold ourselves to. We don’t try to make the other person to be someone they’re not. But we do try to expect the other person to be the BEST person they can be. We can only push each other to a point. And then like you said, we try to realize that the other person is their own unique individual, and you just have to let them be. For a small example, I absolutely love NFL Minnesota Viking Football for my guilty pleasure entertainment. My wife absolutely loves the Star Wars Franchise for her entertainment. Neither of us will probably ever love the other’s choice of entertainment as much as the other, but we try to support the other on their own quest to find happiness. Thanks for the awesome comment, Luke.